Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Pity Party

Yesterday marked 16 months since we were logged in with the CCAA in China.  There are 358 LIDs ahead of us, and the CCAA has referred only 72 days in the last year (since May 1, 2007).  So, the wait ahead of us (and the math involved in figuring it out) is too long to contemplate.  We just keep hoping not too much will change in our lives or China's program before our turn comes.  This month also marks 2 years since we began the adoption process.  Will it be two more?  Three more?  God only knows.  This was not an anniversary I wanted to celebrate with empty arms.  

Yesterday, we got some other disappointing news.  Not anything I can share, not life-altering, just disappointing. 

I gained this week on Weight Watchers.  

Sunday is Mother's Day.  A difficult day for me personally, although I love being able to tell my mom, Mamapa, and my mother-in-law how much I love them.  And my sister, who is an awesome mom.  I did mail off the presents today-- a small triumph since I am almost never this organized when it comes to giving gifts.  I'm ready for next Monday to be here though.  Someone on one of my online adoption forums said she and her husband were having Mother's Day lunch at Hooters, so it's not so "in their face".  I'm not sure that I would go there (literally or figuratively) but I totally get where she is coming from.  

Last week, a beloved teacher at the school where I teach died very suddenly.  It's been a tough week for the staff and students.  She is greatly missed, and there is still much grieving both in and out of class.  

Another friend e-mailed me and shared about a recent loss in her life, which broke my heart for her.  

Tough stuff.

I have so many blessings, and I do count them, but sometimes they seem overshadowed by the hard things.  As Anne of Green Gables would say-- a Jonah day.  Or week, in my case.  I'm sure things'll look better in the morning.  

Ok, party over. 


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